Why are we afraid?

[dchaos]

Hi All

I have been a sweater fetishist pretty much my whole life. I have tried to understand why and have never come up with any reason. I've always been afraid of letting anyone (girlfriends, wife) in on my "secret". I don't dress up in angora though I have tried it. (feels nice but silly). Any time I masterbaite I have the fluffiest of sweaters on my mind. I once thought that I would like to rid myself of this fetish but as I have grown older I have come to realize that I'm fortunate to have something that awakens such powerful feelings of love and desire. I want to try to understand why there seems to be such a stigma involved in this particular fetish. I'm not ashamed anymore, though I do keep it to myself. I would love to be able to let a sex partner in on my fantasies but I always feel that they will be looked upon as weak. Can we discuss this and come to some liberating resolve. Really looking forward to feedback. Keep it hard by keeping it soft!

[tomwpz]

You exhibit pretty remarkable timing, my friend. At least for me. In the last couple of weeks I've been asking myself a whole slew of questions, many of them the same ones you list.

I have clear memories of first becoming aware of my "fascination"; they all take place in a house in which I lived from the age of 8 until 10. Unless I was an "early bloomer" (not the case, by any stretch of the imagination, if subsequent behaviors are any indication) there was no sexual component to this attraction, at least none I was aware of. How many boys are developing fascinations with girls at that age? So I don't have any clear idea what or how the whole thing got started.

Anyway, once the sexual component fired up with a vengeance five or six years later, and became inextricably linked into the whole sweater thing, it's been one frustrating ride. Over the years I have brought three of my girlfriends into my fantasy life; I think it's safe to say that in each case, my doing so "branded" myself as a weirdo (at least!) in their minds, and the relationships didn't last too long after that. I'm pretty much an old fart now, and gave up on relationships a number of years back, so at least that conflict isn't raging as prevalently as it once did.

I've already revealed much more than I intended, so that's all I'll say for now. But I am interested in this thread, and I am interested in this conversation. Thanks for broaching the subject.

-tomwpz

[homair]

In France some years ago, there was a "buzz" about a forum where people discussed their sexual interest; one thread was about mohair fetish, and it attracted many curious eyes and sadly much mockery. People imagined it as very odd when they saw some extreme layering, huge and not good lucky sweaters (for them) and so on. The degree of mockery was somehow shocking to me (and hurt me) , but that is just the way internet goes, so it would be silly go get upset. By the way, look also at the reactions around the more famous Ed Wood example. Without goes as far as cross-dressing, wearing something easily associated with a feminine look might provoke a sense of rejection. Humans always like to draw clear categories, and even if reality never fits them, when the vast majority of them agree about some point (“sweaters are a fetish”), well, you have to admit that you stand outside the norm; but that is also the thrill about it !
Usually, people have totally no idea about sweater fetish, that is why they got so surprised. Also, the nowadays general image about wool is “scratchy, too hot” (a lot of people don’t know the difference between yarns), angora sweaters might be an exception, but girls in large sweater are totally out of the “sexy” category too. When I discovered the diaper fetish, I got maybe as much surprised as the people I am referring to here, and also amused. Anyway, to say it shortly, the link between sex and sweater can look like a real “perversion”. But still, there is nothing dirty or painful associated to it as some other fetish, so the general reaction is not simple rejection or disgust, but laugher (isn’t the strange relation between things usually not associated one of the mechanics of laughing?). The reaction in Germany seems to be somewhat different, amused but with less stupid mockery than in France.
Now, when I confessed my attraction for fuzzy sweater to my girlfriends, they also got surprised, but as well, some of them, interested into it. I mean, there is really nothing bad about it, it can even be a “cute” thing, way more than some other sexual practice. Naturally, I am telling about it only to my girlfriends or very intimate friends. At the same time, I stopped worrying about how people would look at me when wearing fuzzy sweaters (as long as they are not excessive), simply because they have NO IDEA about what it really means for me. Since I came to Japan where I knew nobody and “naturally” stand out as a white foreigner (in the sense that we are not such a common sight here), I started wearing the things I like, angora and mohair sweaters. At some point, people noticed that I had a large collection, and I told some friends that I was also knitting. They are cleaver people and find it “interesting”, but I am pretty sure that no one relates it to sex. What I want to say is that you should not care about wearing the thing you like, as long as it remains “decent” and that you are in general not paying too much attention about provoking a small surprise. In a middle of guys wearing shirts, you might stand out a little, but what then? People in the street will notice you for 1 second, and forget about it after another second; some might think it does not suit you, and some find it a good idea, just different, or whatever, and will also forget about it in no time.
This reply grew too long, sorry… I stop here!

[mohair_cd]

There used to be an adult chat site called http://www.adultchatnetwork.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;. On this site, you could go into any of the already established rooms, of which there were many, or you could create your own. I frequently set up one I called Sweater Fetish with a "subject line" for those who love wool, angora and mohair sweaters. There were numerous other fetish rooms at this site...fur, pvc, hair, shoe, etc, etc, but mine was the only one focused on knitted wool clothing and sweaters. I would occasionally get someone in the room but more often than not, people who I had seen in the other fetish rooms would start with the mockery of my wool fetish. I do not understand how someone who gets sexually aroused by pvc, can call me a freak because wool has that effect on me. I tried pointing out the ridiculousness of people's comment when compared to their own fetishes...but to no avail! Occasionally, I would come across someone who was intrigued by the idea....or even more infrequently, someone who was turned on by my explaination of it...but mostly, I was met with derision and ridicule. Suffice it to say, I no longer waste alot of time in mainstream chats (not that there are that many left) and stick to forums where I know others are welcoming of my wooly tendancies. Stay fluffy my friends!

[mohairdamour]

I can read english but I'm afraid the way I'll try to write it will not be sufficient to talk to you & said why I'm so upset with very fluffy & fuzzy mohair... since a very very long time.... & why I'm so frustrated because my wife now quite hates my sweet passion for... & especially to be completly muffled in some hairy layers to make love with a same dressed mohair partner & lover. And as I cant find one, even when I go outside conveniently dressed with a "classical" sweater... I began a bite ashmed with my addiction....